Sexual Feelings Tumblr 1643 Posts
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Sexual Feelings Tumblr Video
Snoop Dogg - Sensual Seduction (Official Music Video)The first step is to acknowledge to yourself how your body felt, and later to a supportive and understanding person. If you feel judgmental about yourself, remember that feelings are simply feelings, nothing more.
They are not facts or statements; they do not say anything about you or anyone else, other than you are a fully feeling human being.
There are different ways of thinking about this issue, and survivors have come up with different ways of dealing with it.
That is true. Some survivors take the position that regardless of how they learned what they learned about their body and their sexuality what they enjoy sexually, how to have an orgasm, that they are attracted to the same sex, etc.
Some survivors find that they are able to accept their feelings of physical arousal, without judgement when they feel compassion for themselves, and other survivors include feeling compassion for their abusers.
Their compassion helps them to let go of judgement, and to see themselves as the innocent children they were. Some survivors find that feeling shame about having sexual feelings prevents them from fully processing their memories.
When they released some shame and could think about the whole incident s by writing the memory out or telling someone their story, they were able to step back and see the situation with a new perspective and understanding.
That process helped them to accept what happened and feel at peace with themselves. Some survivors need to think a lot about it first, and others need to feel their feelings first.
Your feelings will pass, in time, and that alone will help you to think about yourself with more objectivity and less judgement. Some survivors are terrified to tell any one including their therapist that when they remember and talk about sexual abuse they feel sexual feelings in their body just as they feel other feelings and body sensations.
They are afraid of being viewed as sexually inappropriate, attracted to the therapist or friend, or turned on by sexual abuse i. Many survivors will also feel sexual feelings in their body when they see children or read books about sexual abuse because there is a learned association between these things.
This does not mean the survivor is attracted to children nor their therapists. It means that they are having body memories and the feelings need to be seen as such in order to be processed and released.
Telling your therapist, or acknowledging to yourself, that you are having sexual feelings while remembering or talking about the abuse will help to release those feelings.
Sharing this information in a context of support and understanding is healing. Even if you felt some pleasure or enjoyment; or you wanted some aspects to continue; or you were sexually attracted to the abuser; or you sought the abuser out, the abuser is always responsible for the abuse and not the child.
Think about it this way: if a child sought you out for sexual stimulation, would you do it? You are not to blame for what the abuser did, and you and your body are completely separate from the abuser.
It helps to heal by acknowledging how you truly felt and how your body responded, to think about positive ways of interpreting those responses, to not judge yourself, to place the responsibility for the abuse on the abuser, and to view your body separately from the abuse and the abuse.
Other things you can do to feel more comfortable with your body and sex include: being gentle with your body; holding and massaging emotionally charged areas with your hand and having a partner hold and massage the area as well this will help the area to let go of some of the emotional charge — the feelings associated with the abuse ; gently stroking any area of your body that defends, tightens, numbs, or otherwise reacts to sexual touch; taking sex slowly and stopping when you need to; breathing; laughing; and having fun with sex, touch, and holding.
You are meant to — and can — enjoy your body and all of its beautiful sensations during sex. Children feel what they feel during abuse, including sexual feelings, and there is nothing wrong with that.
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